Fear has the power to control our life, our business, our relationships and our decision making. Only by developing an awareness around our fears and the life we have created because of them, can we truly start conquering them, one by one. Try the following exercises to shine a light on how fear is stopping you from creating the business you dream of and start taking steps towards your desires with confidence.
List it out
Take a piece of paper and divide it into three columns. In the first column, write out all your desires as if you had a magic wand and nothing was impossible. In the second column, next to each desire, write your “yeah but” reason why you believe you can’t have your desire. In the third column, for every “yeah but”, write a fact that disempowers that belief. This could be something you’ve experienced yourself, or something you have seen someone else accomplish. Here’s an example of how you would start this exercise:
What I desire most out of life
What evidence is there, that proves my ‘yeah but’ is false
- I want to scale my business and reach thousands of people.
- Yeah but, I don’t have the skills and experience to make this happen.
- Lisa grew her company without previous experience … so it is possible to achieve.
Explore each area of your life from work, social, relationships, mental and physical health, family and finances. Once you have completed your list, you will have a clear picture of what fears and limiting beliefs are stopping you from achieving your desires.
Awareness is key
The fears and limiting beliefs you hold, will be mirrored by your habitual thoughts. Awareness of these thoughts is the first step in changing them for better serving ones. You can get further clarity on them by setting the alarm on your phone to go off every couple of hours over the next seven days. Make a note of what you were thinking about each time the alarm goes off.
Quieten the negative chatter
After seven days, you will be able to see what your predominant thought patterns are and how they have been keeping hold of your “yeah but’s”. Addressing the negative thoughts is where the real work begins.
Meditation is one way to do this, especially if done first thing in the morning as it sets the tone for the rest of the day. Meditation can be as simple as sitting down for 15 minutes and focussing on your breath. If your mind has something else to focus on, it will lessen the grip on all thoughts. This will create more mental space for you to focus on your desires and what you actually want to manifest.
Consistency and persistence
Change won’t happen overnight. If you have been focussing on negative thoughts for years, you need to re-train your mind for empowering self-talk. However, with daily practice and awareness, you can start changing how you feel about your desires within a few weeks.
Fear keeps us small and stops us from taking action. Now that we are clear about our desires and have evidence they can be accomplished and are working on reducing the negative self-talk that has been holding us back, it’s now time to start taking action.
Actions not goals
Often goals get listed and then forgotten. When we commit to taking action, we take practical steps towards our desires that we can see and feel. Review your list of desires and start making a list of actions you can take to move you towards making it a reality.
In the example above, it could be to enrol onto a marketing course to gain the experience you need or to find a freelancer who can help you with marketing and brand awareness. Keep the actions simple, so you can accomplish them without resistance or feeling overwhelmed. Once achieved, move on to the next action step.
Each step is an accomplishment so make sure you congratulate yourself as you get closer to achieving your desire. Visualise your desires daily and keep in mind that not challenging your fears now, will only lead to regrets later in life.