It’s one thing to show weakness to one’s partner or friend. It’s something quite different showing weakness to one’s team. Organisations are always a reflection of their leaders’ personalities, values and priorities. So if a company wants its employees to talk about their mental health challenges, a leader might want to be prepared to exhibit his or her own.
Humility is required before a leader can talk to anyone about anything. A leader who can openly acknowledge their vulnerability in the midst of a storm and after it is to be praised. Even moreso, a leader who reaches for the sky but also recognises that they have limits. Leaders are bigger than whatever mental health challenges lie in wait. There’s a lot to be gained from being open and honest.
Leah Brown FRSA is the Founder and CEO of Broadstairs Consulting, a Board advisory and mediation practice operating in sports, politics and media. Leah is also a podcast host, freelance writer, professional speaker, and a recovering corporate M&A lawyer.
So with that in mind, here are five prompts to help leaders share their struggles with their teams:
Be Really Clear On What Is To Be Communicated
Teams see how hard their leaders are working. People look up to their leaders who probably don’t reveal the extent of the struggle day to day but that doesn’t mean they aren’t allowed to. People are human and can only take so much. But teams don’t need to know everything a leader is experiencing. Leaders should only disclose as much as is necessary to share, being as factual as possible, and practising what is going to be said before speaking with the team.
In a crisis a leader’s world is falling apart and common themes are isolation and despair. But even in crisis, there is agency. Leaders can model that agency by disclosing the problem to those around and the go-forward plan of action. Asking permission to take next steps is always a good way to frame this.
It takes strength of character to communicate well in tough times but it will pay dividends. Leaders will thank themselves later if they manage to communicate with really clear boundaries early on.
Leaders Are Works In Progress
Good leadership is not having all the answers but being able to ask the right questions. A leader’s instinct is to protect. But teams don’t need to be rolled in bubble wrap. They are adults; adults who can see that leadership and entreprenuerialism is hard.
It may seem counterintuitive for a leader to seek support from their teams when struggling with mental health. But, “if you can’t see it, you can’t be it”. Teams need leaders to be a work in progress so that they, too, feel like it’s okay to be a work in progress. Otherwise it’s one rule for management and another rule for everyone else.
Maintain Perspective And Ask Questions
Leaders tend to be overwhelmed and exhausted on top of whatever they are experiencing. Why not give the team the opportunity to speak what’s on their mind, to respond to the concerns being shared with them? To show their leaders that they care, that they’ve understood. Doing this will ensure the team feels heard. Talking about mental health shouldn’t be a monologue but an opportunity to engage people in dialogue.
Some companies want everyone to have the chance to present their thoughts and insights; to be given the chance to share what’s on their minds. When people feel seen and heard the impact on the team can be transformative. But also, a burden shared is a burden halved. Think of the mental load leaders can free themselves from by not worrying about the unsaid things.
Don’t Forget To Empathise
There is no monopoly on challenging mental health. Please make room at the table for those who are also suffering, or responsible for someone suffering. Leaders may be better at hiding their mental health experiences but by sharing can empower a teams to choose a better path in dark times. Sharing and empathising, leaving space for the experiences of others in one’s own experience, will create a caring, sympathetic environment. It will maintain dialogue and a sense of belonging. It will improve connection within the wider team.
Point The Team To Support
The team needs somewhere to process the emotional demands of the job that is separate from its leader. An independent safe space where they can process stuff, including stuff about the leader and whatever they might be bringing to the table howsoever it might be affecting them.
Leaders need to create spaces for their teams – resources or temporary arrangements – available at all times, not least when leaders are incapacitated, so that teams are empowered to keep showing up day in day out.
In summary, if it is the right time to share information with the team, leaders must make sure they communicate clearly. Leaders are allowed to be a work in progress, and should feel free to share a go-forward plan if appropriate. Leaders shouldn’t forget to ask questions and must empathise with those who are also struggling. Do ensure that employees are pointed to support and resources to ensure that they can continue to thrive whatever happens next.
